Book Excerpt – Shattered 2

Shattered 2

Chapter 4 Excerpt (Therapy Session with Dr. Scott)

“Yeah, well, Cam is the only person who has been consistent.”

“Consistent in what, exactly?”

“Everything,” I state. “Without her, I don’t think I would have survived.”

“Girl, Cam isn’t a resolution to your problem, she’s residue and I don’t mean the kind that reminds you of something good. Cam is a constant reminder of what you’re hiding from and as long as she’s here, she’ll taint everything you touch.”

“You say that like it’s easy to forget. I know Cam isn’t good for me but what am I supposed to do? Was I supposed to pray to God when He was the one who allowed that man to hurt me?”

“Camille, God didn’t allow that, evil did.”

“Yeah well, evil or not it happened, and you act like it’s easy to forget that.”

“I never said forgetting but at some point, you’ve got to come out from behind this wall you’ve built and that starts by an inward cleaning.”

“How?”

“Come with me,” Dr. Scott tells me.

I follow her down the hall to a bathroom. When she opens the door, my mouth drops and my hand flies up to cover my nose.

“You didn’t expect to see this, did you?”

I shake my head no.

“Did you assume this bathroom would be clean?”

“Of course,” I reply.

“Why?”

“Because the house is.”

“Oh, so since this house with its pristine outside is clean, you never would have suspected it to have something so filthy inside, right?”

“To be honest, no. I assumed—”

“You assumed?” she chuckles. “People assume that because we’re fixed up on the outside, from the image we portray that inwardly it’s the same. However, most of us walk around daily, just as filthy as this bathroom because it’s easy to hide, if we close the door. Go on in.”

I hesitate.

“What’s the problem?” she questions.

“It stinks in there and it’s full of trash.” I say.

“So,” she shrugs, “your insides stink too. The only difference between you and this bathroom is that it’s filled with trash while you’re filled with shattered pieces of you.”

Shattered 2 Available Now


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#BookExcerpt – 2:32 AM: Losing Faith in God

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Get it here –>2:32 AM: Losing Faith in God

Charlotte’s Therapy Session

“How have you been since our last meeting?”

“In all honesty Dr. Mitchell, I don’t know how I am. One minute I think I am doing good and the next I’m crying uncontrollably.”

“That is to be expected Charlotte. You suffered a major loss.”

“But when does it get better?”

“I wish I had the answer. In your moments of crying, what are you feeling?”

“Sometimes I feel like I want to close my eyes and never open them again.”

“As in suicide?”

I nod.

“When was the last time you had thoughts of harming yourself?”

“Last night or early this morning, the times are all running together.”

“What stopped you?”

“I’m afraid to die. Even though this pain is sometimes unbearable, I am still afraid of death.”

“Why is that?”

“I don’t know, maybe it is fear of the unknown.”

“Do you believe God has a plan for our lives?” She asks.

“I do.”

“What do you believe your purpose is?”

“I haven’t figured it out yet. Since losing our baby, I feel empty.”

“Tell me about Micaela.”

I sigh, trying to stop the tears that want to leap from my soul.
“She, um, she was born January fourth at 7:42pm. She was stubborn, like me, deciding she was coming on her own time.” I laugh. “She had dimples, the softest hair and the sweetest smell.”

“Do you have pictures of her?”

“I do but I haven’t looked at them since she died.”

“Why not?”

“It’s too hard.”

Neither of us say anything so I break the silence.

“This morning, I was on the internet and I searched for the name of mothers who have lost children.”

“What did you find?”

“A lot of blogs on how to grieve and deal with the loss but nothing gives us a name.”

“Do you think you need one?”

“Of course. We should be called shells.”

“Why shells?”

“Because a definition of shell is an outer form without substance.”

“Why do you feel you have no substance? You’re alive with breath in your body, a heart and soul and in your right mind.”

“Yea but what is my purpose? What kind of substance do I have? I had a baby but she died so I’m no longer a mother.”

“What about being a wife?”

“A wife. Humph. Funny you should ask …

Get it here –>2:32 AM: Losing Faith in God

The bible tells you how to fight the enemy but what do you do when it feels like it is God you’re up against?

Charlotte’s nightmare began at 2:32AM, the morning she experienced the most unimaginable pain ever, the loss of a child.

Now, she finds herself angry at God. She trusted Him and He took her only child. She prayed to Him and it seems as if He has turned His back on her. And if things could not get worse, hell keeps showing up at her door.

What can she do, when she continually cries in the darkness but gets no answer? Where can she turn when it feels like her back is against the wall and there is no way out? Who can she depend on if God let her down?

Questions Charlotte ponder when the memories snatch her from her sleep at 2:32AM. Questions that make her angry because to her, God has forsaken them.

2:32 AM: Losing Faith in God
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Excerpt from Shattered 2

“Camille, I am not your enemy and I know this is out of your comfort zone and may even be an unorthodox way of doing therapy but sometimes, you have to think outside of normalcy to see change. This place, I call Sobriety House, is a safe haven for women, just like you, who are carrying things you need to be detoxed from.”

“I’m not an addict.”

“Sobriety, isn’t only from drugs and alcohol because in reality; anger, abuse, self-sabotage, soul ties, doubt and etc. are all things that keep us under the influence. I call it, being spiritually intoxicated. It’s like being physically intoxicated because you lose your sense of thinking and you say and do things you can’t take back due to your mood being altered and your brain function impaired. Camille, being here at Sobriety House is only the start. In order for this program to work, you’ve got to first admit that you have a problem.”

I sigh.

“Do you have a problem, Camille?” Dr. Scott questions.

I close my eyes and take a deep breath. “Yes,” I say looking at her and she motions for me to sit down. Once I’m seated, she begins to pray.

“Dear God …”

Shattered 2, coming soon but in the meantime, get caught up with Shattered 1 by cllcking here –> https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07YCRJMNG

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Excerpt … Shattered

Shattered available now on Amazon

“I do want this marriage, why else would I still be here?”

“To annoy me,” I shrug then laugh. “Maybe this is karma for everything I’ve done, to you or it’s God’s way of punishing me for breaking my vows. Either way, I can’t keep doing this. When I get back from Miami, I’m going to find somewhere else to stay and file for divorce. Now, get out,” I say walking over to open the door.

He grabs my arm, turning me to face him and closes the door. “I’m not going anywhere and you’re going to listen to me, for once.”

“I don’t—”

“Damn it, Camille.” The sound of his voice causes me to jump. “I’m sorry for yelling but I’ve put up with so much of your crap and never once did I say divorce. The nights, no the mornings you’d come in from doing God knows what, I was right here. When you threw in my face, your cheating, I still gave you chance after chance. The night you overdosed—”

“Don’t.”

“No,” he says pushing me back against the wall. “The night you overdosed, I gave you the option to stay and get help, but you left, and we all know how that worked out. You, laying in the hospital for seven days and I was right there, watching you fight for your life.

Camille, I’ve always been here, for you, even when I should have put your ass out and now, the first time I mess up, you want to leave me. Well, you can’t because you owe me more than that.”

I snatch my arm away from him. “I don’t owe you anything.”

“Like hell! You owe me the same freaking thing I keep giving you and that’s a chance. Camille, I made a huge mistake but why is my sin costing more than all the ones you’ve committed? Why should I have to pay, with our marriage when you almost paid with your life and yet, I’m right here? Am I not worth, fighting for?”

I slide down to the floor.

“You don’t get to decide that we’re over. You have to fight for me, at least once because I deserve it and damn it, you’re going to do it.”

Shattered available now on Amazon

#ChristianFiction #Shattered #Damagednotdestroyed #Restoration #Share #ReadReviewRecommend

New Book Alert … Shattered

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What would you do, if you could no longer hide behind the wall you’ve created?

What would you do, if the shattered pieces of your life began to cut, deeper and you can no longer hide the blood?

For Camille Shannon, she’s unapologetic about who she is, until she comes face to face with a demon of her past and it sends her spiraling.

From unfaithfulness to drugs, to love and loss; she’s experienced it. Some of it is due to her actions yet when she tries to get her life together, it’s proving to be harder than she expected. Will Camille find the strength to deal with the skeletons, in her closet, the ones that left her torn and battered; or will she always be Camille Shannon, hiding instead of owning her truth … she’s SHATTERED?

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Excerpt:

“I’m sick of having this same argument with you.”

“And I’m sick of assuming you want this marriage,” I tell him.

“I do want this marriage, why else would I still be here?”

“To annoy me,” I shrug then laugh. “Maybe this is karma for everything I’ve done, to you or it’s God’s way of punishing me for breaking my vows. Either way, I can’t keep doing this. When I get back from Miami, I’m going to find somewhere else to stay and file for divorce. Now, get out,” I say walking over to open the door.

He grabs my arm, turning me to face him and closes the door. “I’m not going anywhere and you’re going to listen to me, for once.”

“I don’t—”

“Damn it, Camille.” The sound of his voice causes me to jump. “I’m sorry for yelling but I’ve put up with so much of your shit and never once did I say divorce. The nights, no the mornings you’d come in from doing God knows what, I was right here. When you threw in my face, your cheating, I still gave you chance after chance. The night you overdosed—”

“Don’t.”

“No,” he says pushing me back against the wall. “The night you overdosed, I gave you the option to stay and get help, but you left, and we all know how that worked out. You, laying in the hospital for seven days and I was right there, watching you fight for your life. Camille, I’ve always been here, for you, even when I should have put your ass out and now, the first time I mess up, you want to leave me. Well, you can’t because you owe me more than that.”

I snatch my arm away from him.

“I don’t owe you anything.”

“Like hell! You owe me the same freaking thing I keep giving you and that’s a chance. Camille, I made a huge mistake but why is my sin costing more than all the ones you’ve committed? Why should I have to pay, with our marriage when you almost paid with your life and yet, I’m right here? Am I not worth, fighting for?”

BUY HERE

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