It's not just writing, it's ministry
I REFUSE TO ALLOW MY PAST, WHAT THEY DID & SAID, WHAT I’VE LOST, HOW THEY LABELED ME, WHAT I’VE DONE AND ENDURED TO ROB ME OF WHAT GOD HAS FOR ME!!
Today, I am reclaiming my power, my voice, my place, and my God-given identity, so that I no longer walk in shame, but leap with the faith, joy, and assurance that I am who I am because of whose I am.
Therefore, allow me to reintroduce myself.
Hello, I am God’s chosen. It’s nice to meet you.
Eleven years ago, I preached my first sermon. “Called, not cursed.” Today, I’m still standing on this declaration because (and I can be honest) ministry is hard, tedious, doesn’t always pay well, takes sacrifice, time, sleep and sometimes gives people the audacity to try you.
However, even with all of these things, I’d still say yes to God. In fact, I wish I hadn’t waited so long to answer Him. But I realized, had I said yes before I did, I would’ve messed up what God had planned for me. Therefore, I’m grateful to be in this, my place, and God’s purpose doing what He’s anointed me to do.
Therrfore, if you dont mind, let me encourage myself. Happy Preach-a-versary Pastor Kisha. Keep going because God’s plan for you is God’s plan for YOU! And every seed, tear, groan, prayer, dollar, fast, minute and cry is and will be worth it.
You got this, girl!
What if you were to treat the pain and not the problem?
What do you mean Pastor Kisha?
Imagine going to the doctor, in severe pain, and they prescribe narcotics. Now, while the medication works, when it wears off the pain returns. Why? Because the pain has been treated, but not the cause of the pain.
Beloved, how much longer will you carry on, masking the pain? How much longer will you act like there’s nothing wrong? How long are you going to keep putting off healing? Baby, you’ll never heal if you keep pretending you aren’t hurt.
Deal with the mommy/daddy issues, abandonment woes, generational curses, and self-esteem problems. Get help for the depression, anxiety, and your mental health. Grieve the person who has died and the one still alive, but dead to you. Speak the truth of how they made you feel. Forgive yourself for what you allowed and took. Heal the wounds you keep bandaging because they can still become infected even when they are covered. Which may be the stench you smell. 😒
Heal mane. Heal because there’s so much waiting on the healed version of you.
Treat the problem, not just the pain!
We think that when one door closes, God will open another one. Now, while I believe God will close doors, relationships, access, contracts, etc. that are detrimental to our being and purpose, what if He doesn’t open the next “thing” right away?
What if God doesn’t immediately open another door because He needs you to heal or sit and deal with what you’ve just come out of? What if God doesn’t open another door, right away, because there’s some pruning and processing required before you are mentally ready to get what’s next? What if the next door isn’t opened because God needs to strengthen you while you wait? What if the next door isn’t opened, immediately, because God needs you to slow down and rest before you get up for the next leg of the journey?
What if the blessing is the closing of the door AND the waiting? How will you wait?
You do know that God is still God even when you’re looking at the closed door and waiting. You do know that God will provide. You do know that when God deems you ready, He’ll open everything meant for you and there will be nothing lost. Including your life, mind, provisions, stuff, and time.
So, how will you wait?
“But those who wait on the Lord Shall renew their strength; They shall mount up with wings like eagles, They shall run and not be weary, They shall walk and not faint.” – Isaiah 40:31 NKJV
8/28/2014 + 1 Day – A date deemed worthy of displaying on my right wrist.
See, it was eleven years + one day ago that I stopped running from God’s call. Yet, it’d be the day after that my life began to align with God’s will. I’ve shared this testimony before, but I could not let this day pass without telling it again for somebody who needs a reminder of God’s promises. No, I’m not about to sell you a fairy tale or try to convince you that saying yes to God will erase all your troubles. However, I know how saying yes restored what I did not even realize was broken and stitched what I couldn’t see was bleeding.
Y’all, I stood in the bathroom stall at work, bawling and apologizing to God for all the time I’d wasted. Times when I was tired but still trying to fight what I couldn’t win. Weighed down and wounded yet still trying to act like all was good. Drowning in debt and tired!
Then I said yes.
Did it erase every trouble? No. Has it always been good and easy? No. Have I always been good and faithful? No. But God has. And I realized something. Even though I was disobedient, sinful, sometimes prideful, raggedy, and not worthy, had God given me destiny then, I would have messed it up. This is why I’m grateful for all I’ve been through. #Godsplan
That day, back in 2014, our entire life shifted. God told me to pack our apartment up and move. We did, even though we had no clue where we were going. My husband probably thought I was crazy, but he trusted my OBEDIENCE to what I heard God say. So, we packed up over Labor Day weekend 2014, put everything in storage, moved to an Extended Stay for two weeks, and then with my In-Loves for 2 weeks before finding a rental in Southaven. Get this … when we moved into that house, we didn’t pay one bill late and haven’t since. WITH THE SAME MONEY! #GodsProvision
The person you see today Lakisha had nothing to do with it. Who I am is because God didn’t give up on me. God waited through my sin, silliness, struggle, secrets, self-doubt, and stupidity. God waited for me to trust Him with my life. God waited until I gave him my yes. Sure, I was still in some of the stuff above, but because I gave God access and permission, He could then come in and do what I couldn’t … cleanse me. #GodsPromise
Beloved, I don’t know why you’re afraid to give God a yes. I don’t know what things you’re trying to fight alone. I don’t know what your past, current circumstances, anger, or fear are trying to get you to believe about yourself. BUT TRUST GOD! Why? Because He never fails and He never forgets you. He may leave you in the fight longer, but He’s there. He may let you face some battles, but He’s there. Trust Him.
It’s been eleven years + one day and I’m still trusting God with my yes. Will you?
Lakisha, the Author