Lynn
I run around the bedroom, lighting the candles on the nightstand. When I hear the chirp of the alarm, I quickly turn off the lights, remove my robe and stand next to the bed.
“Lynn, where are you?” Jerome calls out.
“In the bedroom.”
“Why do you have the lights off?” He asks flicking the light switch and then laughing. “What are you doing and what do you have on?”
“I am trying to have a romantic night with my husband.” I angrily reply grabbing my robe.
“Why are you dressed like a street walker? Where are the kids?” He asks taking off his suit jacket and throwing it across the chair.
“They are with my parents for the weekend but just disregard the fact your wife is standing in front of you semi-nude.” I reply blowing out the candles. “What is wrong with you?”
“Me? What is wrong with you? Where did you even get that outfit from?”
“I bought it because I thought you’d appreciate me going out of my way.”
“Why would you think that? I just hope nobody saw you in the store.” He says.
“Because I am your wife and it’s the only thing I requested for my birthday.”
His eyes widen.
“You forgot. Figures.”
“Babe, I’m sorry.” He says sitting on the side of the bed. “With everything going on at work and the church, it slipped my mind. We had the final meeting with the new youth minister and she accepted the position. I think she’s going to be a great fit for the church and the changes with the youth department and you’re going to like her, I think. In fact, you both kind of favor.”
“JEROME!” I yell to stop him from speaking. “I don’t want to talk about no freaking church when I’m standing here half naked.”
“Sorry. Look, put some clothes on, some decent clothes and we can go out to eat.”
“No,” I say slowly walking up to him. “I have everything we need right here so why don’t you take off your clothes and we stay in?” I kiss him on the forehead before loosening his tie. “I went to this store and got some stuff for us to play with and,” I kiss him again.
“What kind of stuff?” He asks interrupting.
“Some edible stuff.” I kiss him again. “Some sticky stuff.” I kiss him again.
“And some kinky, useful stuff.”
“Wait, you mean them sex toys?”
“Yep and whip cream, strawberries–”
He pushes me away.
“You know I’m not using those things Lynn.”
I fall onto the bed. “Come on Jerome. What’s the harm? It’s our marriage bed and the bible says–”
“I know what the bible says but aren’t you the one who just said you didn’t want to hear not bible talk?”
“You know that is not what I meant. We need some fun added to our marriage bed.”
“There is nothing wrong with our marriage bed. We have three children to prove that and if it ain’t broke, don’t break it trying to fix it.”
“Jerome, making children has nothing to do with our sex life which sucks, by the way.”
“Where are you getting this from? Who have you been talking too?”
“Why would I need to talk to anybody? If you were to get your head out of the bible and look at your wife, you’d see for yourself. All we ever do, is the same old tired missionary position with your five pumps. Hell, your idea of foreplay is rubbing on me like we’re in middle school. You don’t even kiss me anymore and I’m tired of it. I want you to make love to me like you used too!”
“You been watching that Fifty Shades stuff again, haven’t you? What did I tell you about that mess? Got you around here looking and sounding like a plum fool.”
“Forget you Jerome!”
“Lynn, I don’t know what is wrong with you but I’m going to take a shower. If you want to go out to dinner, be dressed by the time I am done.”
He walks into the bathroom and slams the door.
I walk into the closet and take off the lingerie and slip on a bra. I look through my clothes and pull a black tank dress from the hanger.
Putting it on, I grab a pair of black strappy sandals from the shelf. Sitting on the ottoman, I fasten them before standing to look at myself in the full-length mirror.
I run my hand over my hair and look closely to ensure my makeup is still intact. I take a red clutch from the shelf before leaving out the bedroom and going into the kitchen to get my license, lip gloss, credit card and keys from my other purse.
Making sure I have everything, I walk over to the alarm panel. Setting it to stay, I open the door before turning to look down the hall.
“Oh, I got your dinner boo.”
***
I hope you’ve enjoyed the first chapter of The Marriage Bed. If you did, you can get a copy of the full book HERE.
As always, Happy Reading!
Lakisha
Daily Devotional – 10/12/18 “Obedience and Sacrifice”
I was looking over Facebook memories and the devotional, from last year, reminded me of obedience. Not that I needed reminding because I often reflect on where I used to be, when I was out of God’s will and it’s hard not to remember when all I had was struggle. Reality is, it didn’t just start in 2013 because I was out of God’s will long before that. Yes, I was raised in church with memories dating back to childhood but church wasn’t in me. I had the religion down but no relationship with God. (I’ve shared this before.) I was good at dressing, talking and acting the part but I wasn’t living the part. If there was something needed to be done, in the church, I was there. Something going on, I was there. Prayer breakfast, I cooked and served. Yet, I was leaving there bound, confused and struggling. Why am I sharing this again? For somebody who read it last year and still stuck. For somebody who, on this day, is struggling and suicidal. For somebody who is, like I was … using your lunch break, on paydays to renew check advances and still struggling. Paying on title loans and still struggling. Barely eating because you’re still struggling. In over your head and can’t figure a way out. I am talking to you today. Yes, you know you need to be in God’s will but here is what I need to share with you. Getting in God’s will won’t make your struggles disappear overnight because obedience comes with sacrifice. Bible says in Isaiah 1:19-20, “If you are willing and obedient, you shall eat the good of the land; but if you refuse and rebel, you shall be eaten by the sword; for the mouth of the LORD has spoken.”
Y’all know my story. My husband and I packed up a 3 bedroom apartment in 2 days and moved without having a new address because God said so. Because we did, our lives changed. However, with obedience came sacrifice. See, before I gave God my yes and got serious about His will, we’d filed bankruptcy (a 2nd time). Yet, here is the blessing. After I gave God my yes and willingly obeyed Him; we converted from Wage Earner to full Bankruptcy. While a tow truck driver waited to pick up our old car, we were getting approved for a new car with the same finance company. While we didn’t have our own address, we weren’t homeless. We trusted God! We obeyed God. We moved by God. We didn’t get six figure jobs, we’re still with the same companies. We didn’t hit the lottery or win big gambling; we obeyed God. Yes, on the surface it looked like we were in God’s will but we were anything but. We had to take a step back before we could go forward. Will you do that? Will you willingly get for real about God and obey Him? Will you give God a yes then take a step back and for real reexamine your life; naturally and spiritually? Will you obey God’s voice even if it doesn’t make sense? I know you’ve been handling it on your own but how has that worked for you, so far? Look, I’m not saying every day since, for us, have been all great, they haven’t but we’re better now. And that came with obedience and sacrifice. Put your life into perspective, stop being mad at God and start being obedient and see if your life doesn’t change. And because you do, others will be changed as a result.
Daily Devotional – 10/11/18 “What cha’ going back for?”
Yesterday, I told you to go and get your stuff but did you notice what I didn’t say? I did not tell you to go and get your stuff back. You want to know why? Because sometimes the blessing is being okay with leaving with only the broken pieces of you. The broken pieces of your heart, mind, body and soul because if you leave, you now have the chance to rebuild. Sure, I know you want the couch back you paid for but leave it and the bad memories. I know you left the dishes grandma gave you but let them keep them if it means your freedom. Revenge, you want it but at what cost? Beloved, find the healing in saying goodbye and the severing of that toxic relationship. Find the restoration, you’ve been longing for, by finally getting the strength to walk out without looking back. And quit saying, “I’m coming for everything the enemy stole.” Do you not realize, in order to get back what was stolen you have to deal with the thief who took it? That’s like going back to see the person who kidnapped you, after you’ve been freed. It doesn’t make sense. You’re free even if it’s with bruises, bad memories, tears and pain. You’re free. And what cha’ going back for when God has given you the promise of restoration, when you trust in and praise Him?
Bible shares in Joel 2:23-25, “Be glad, O children of Zion, and rejoice in the LORD your God, for He has given you the autumn rains for your vindication. He sends you showers, both autumn and spring rains, as before. The threshing floors will be full of grain, and the vats will overflow with new wine and oil. I will repay you for the years that the swarming locusts have eaten—the young locust, the destroying locust, and the devouring locust—My great army that I sent against you.” God says He will REPAY you. Repay is to do or give something as recompense for a favor or kindness received. In other words, because you trust in God, because you praise God, because you are faithful to God and because you follow God’s command; He’ll repay you for everything you’ve lost. So, to you my brother and my sister; stop trying to get back what you bought in suffering when God will repay every year you lost by your sacrifice. That child support, let it go. The time you can’t get back, let it go. That stuff in the attic, let it go. Those boxes in the garage, leave them. And this time when you leave, although it may be with some brokenness, you will survive. Not only will you survive but you’ll be repaid for EVERY year!
Daily Devotional – 10/10/18 “Go get your stuff!”
It’s Wednesday and someone is watching time get away from you because something or someone from your past is trying to delay the purpose assigned to your life. Yea, this thing or person has shown up and it’s wreaking havoc on the very thing you thought would work this time. Now, you’re crying yourself to sleep because it seems all your hard work was in vain. You cannot concentrate because you’re worried about folk finding out who you used to be and they may not understand. You’re wandering aimlessly through your day and the weight of this thang is getting heavier. Well baby, I’m stopped by to give you a quick word. It shouldn’t be a shock to you because I’ve told you before. You shouldn’t be surprised by this but I’ll share it anyway. Here it is … The only person, place or thing; alive or in the process of being created that can keep you from getting what God has for you is YOU. Take back the rights to your story, deliver your own message and let folk know; if I survived all the hell I’ve been through, I’ll be doggone if I allow you to stand up and tell my story wrong. Yep, I did that. Yep, I did him/her. Yep, I said that. Yep, I went there. Yep, I wore that. Yep, I was a member there. Yep, I was foolish then. Yep, I wrote bad checks. Yep, I’ve filed bankruptcy more than once. Yep, that was me. Oh but now!
See, when you take back your power, you take the power out of the hands of others. When you tell your story of what you used to be and look like, no one else can hold it over your head. This is why, sometimes, you have to pull rank and tell folk … Look, I don’t care what my background shows, I will not allow you to demean my present character because I am not that person anymore. I don’t care what my arrest record shows, I will not allow you to destroy my present because I am not that person anymore. And if that means you keep your job, keep it. If that means I will not receive help from you, I don’t want it. If that means you no longer want to be friends, goodbye. I am no longer in the business of trying to convince you I’m worthy. Yeah, the old me would have but this is the new me and I don’t care what you think. God made me who I am. He constructed me this way and if you have a problem with who I am, now, take it up with God because I’m done explaining. Beloved, get your power back and then go get your stuff. How? By trusting God’s love for us and His word because He says in Isaiah 55:11-13, “The rain and snow come down from the heavens and stay on the ground to water the earth. They cause the grain to grow, producing seed for the farmer and bread for the hungry. It is the same with my word. I send it out, and it always produces fruit. It will accomplish all I want it to, and it will prosper everywhere I send it. You will live in joy and peace. The mountains and hills will burst into song, and the trees of the field will clap their hands! Where once there were thorns, cypress trees will grow. Where nettles grew, myrtles will sprout up. These events will bring great honor to the LORD’s name; they will be an everlasting sign of his power and love.”
Lakisha, the Author 