I can remember the summers when all the children in the neighborhood were out flipping in the grass, playing kickball in the street, hide-go-seek and doing cartwheels.  Then kids didn’t worry about messing their hair up or getting their clothes dirty.  They didn’t have to worry about how the boy or girl up the street felt about them because everybody was out playing together. Now, kids are so busy texting, sexting, putting on makeup and too little clothes to even enjoy a summer day’s breeze.  They won’t even go out with “play clothes” on because they are too worried about what others think.  Time ain’t like it used to be!

I can remember Christmas at grandma’s when you use to wake up to the house smelling like turkey and dressing, Christmas tree was up, house filled with family and a shoebox that was filled with apple, oranges and candy that was made personally for each child.  I can remember going to early morning service at church that taught you the real meaning of Christmas and being grateful for whatever gift was under the tree because it didn’t matter about the size or the cost.  I can remember eating until you were so full all you could do was sleep and 2 folk fighting over the wishbone from the turkey to see who would get the piece to put over the door frame.  Now, momma/daddy has gotten too busy to put up a tree and they don’t cook anymore because it is easier to buy a meal already prepared.  Kids have forgotten the real meaning of what Christmas stands for because we no longer teach it.  They are more concerned with what gifts are under the tree and if you got them what they asked for.  You’ve spent every dime of your bill money to make sure they have the PS3, Xbox, Jordan’s, polo shirts and Chuck Taylor shoes and then you are hungry the following week or your lights are off.  We, as parents, have gotten so wrapped up in the materialistic things of this world that we’ve missed out on the word.  Mark 4:19 states “but the worries of this life, the deceitfulness of wealth and the desires for other things come in and choke the word, making it unfruitful.” We’ve become so earthly that we are no longer fit for Heaven.  Time ain’t what it used to be!

I can remember when adults in the neighborhood could punish us when they caught us doing wrong or being disrespectful.  The friends that I grew up with in grandma’s neighborhood still laugh about the whooping we use to get from my granddaddy when we got caught in the back of his truck or sneaking to the candy lady.  Once you got in trouble from the neighbors, you were sure to get in trouble again when you got home because they were going to call.  Teachers would call home for you acting out in class and it was never a question of who was right or wrong because an adult had spoken.  If momma had to come to the school, you already knew your butt was in trouble and if there was a problem with the teacher, it was never known to us.  See, parents then didn’t handle grown folk business in the presence of kids.  But oh now, as soon as somebody say something to your child you’re ready to give them a beat down.  You haven’t even taken the time to find out what the problem is because you’ve already jumped to enough conclusions.  The teacher calls and tells you that Pookie is cutting up in class, he comes home and say, she just don’t like me and there you go up to the school acting like you have no home training.  You talk so disrespectful to the teacher (in front of Pookie) and then wonder why he/she is like that.  You got the nerve to curse the one person out, who is only telling you what you already know, your child needs their butt whooped.  Time ain’t like it used to be.

You wonder why your princess is acting like a garden tool when she sees Momma acting the same way.  You got the audacity to have men coming & going from your house like it’s an hourly motel and then wonder why she can’t keep a boyfriend.  You’ve never talked to her about the dangers of having sex but you cry when she gets an STD or a baby.  Um… it’s too late then.  You talk to your boyfriends in front of her while your husband is at home but then wonder why she can’t be faithful.  You let Jerome knock you upside the head in front of her and then have the nerve to wonder why she won’t leave her abusive boyfriend.  The majority of most children grow up to accept what they’ve seen in the household.  You and your 14-year-old daughter dress the same way and you don’t see a problem.  Both of your shorts are the same size as panties and then you get mad when a guy calls you out your name.  You are in the club more than your 18-year-old and then get mad when she won’t take your advice.  Chile stop it!

When we were growing up, we stayed in a child’s place. “When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me.” (1 Corinthians 13:11) When adults talked we left the room.  When momma/daddy said to do something, you jumped before they could finish the sentence.  When you acted up in school, you got a whopping.  When you acted up in church, you got pinched.  There was no such thing as I don’t feel like going, sleeping or texting in church, acting up in the grocery store or begging from other folk.  We didn’t wear $100 tennis shoes and jeans, we didn’t go to the beauty shop every week or get our nails done but yet we still survived.  When we got home from school we did our homework and then chores before anything else.  We didn’t have to have notes left to tell us what we needed to do because it was already understood.  If we got out of line, momma/daddy had no problem hitting us in the mouth and yet we survived.  At 13, my sisters and I could cook full course meals, care for our younger brothers/sisters and clean a house better than Momma because she was working and yet we survived.  Children, now, wouldn’t survive if they had to cook for themselves because our world has become so fast that we don’t take the time to teach anymore.  We don’t raise our daughters to be worthy wives and our sons worthy husbands and yet we wonder why the divorce rates among young folk are so high.  Daddies are not talking to their daughters, telling them they are pretty or giving them the love they need so they go out and find it from the first boy who whispers in their ear.  Mothers are not telling their sons they are worthy of a good woman, handsome and able to be what they choose so they fall into the arms of the first woman who raises her skirt. 

We need to start being parents.  Get involved in their school, manage what they do online, go through the phones that you pay for and have a conversation with them.  Whoop some butts!  (Proverbs 13:24, “He who spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is careful to discipline him.”)  Take away some of that high-priced stuff you’ve bought, take them to the library or make them go outside (without the cellphone).  Time isn’t like it used to be which is why we should have a better handle on what our children are doing.  They are growing up and dealing with grown up issues too fast.  This world is cold and mean and doesn’t care about the age of your son or daughter.  Start at home and prepare them for the bitterness of folk.  Not everyone is concerned about their wellbeing but they won’t know that unless you teach them. 

Time sure isn’t what it used to be! I thank God for grandma, granddad, momma and uncles because they instilled in me the values that have made me the woman I am.  I’m not a perfect parent because this is for me as well, but we’ve got to do better.  We are losing too many of our children to this world. 

Time ain’t what it used to be but that doesn’t stop us from being great parents.