Daily Devotional – 11/16/11 “Love shouldn’t hurt this much!”

There’s this young lady, 20 maybe 22, who has been in a relationship with a man she thinks is her world and who could never do any wrong.  They’ve been together for 5 years and even have a daughter together.  In front of family, friends and in pictures she displays a smile so big that no one can see the pain underneath it.  She tells her family this is the man for her and he provides for her and the baby better than she could ever expect.  But what she forgot to mention was the cost she was paying for the providing he provided.  Behind closed doors, this provider was a monster.  He would come home after a long day and unwind by knocking her around.  He was careful to not leave bruises and scars that were noticeable to folk so he hit her in places she could hide it.  She was so scared to leave because he always threatens to find her.  Now, she was raised in a Christian household with a father that would never lay a hand on his wife or any woman for that matter and she was taught that God loved her and he would take care of her if she let him in.  But she thought this was the way love was supposed to be because she didn’t read the bible for herself that states “Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love (1 John 4:7-8).  But somewhere in the midst of this relationship she lost her focus on God and her life was spiraling out of control.  One night, while her man was out with friends, she settled in for a quiet evening with her daughter.  She fixed her bottle and had put her down to sleep and afterwards she sat her desk writing a letter.  After she finished, she ran a bath to clear her head.  She put on her nightgown and went to bed.  When her man came home, he found her unresponsive in the bed with an empty bottle of sleeping pills.  He raced to the baby’s room to find her, too, unresponsive (from the medicine that had been placed in her bottle) and he dialed 911.  After realizing the 2 women in his life would be there no more, he found the letter on the desk that simply read, LOVE SHOULDN’T HURT THIS MUCH!

Maybe you’re not facing a situation like this and maybe you’ve never felt pain like she felt but are you dealing with hurtful love?  You’re a 19-year-old young man who has dated the same girl since 9th grade year.  You all made plans for college, for her business and you, football and a life together always.  But then an injury happens and you are no longer the shining star she once held so high and college didn’t work for her because she wouldn’t go to class.  Now you are living together in a 1 bedroom apartment with your 2 month old son and you’ve been working your butt off to pay the bills while she stays home.  You pick up all the extra hours that you can just to make ends meet but every day you come in, she is nagging. (You know the word others use but since this is a devotional, I’ll keep it PG).  Every day she reminds you of your faults instead of your good deeds, she complains about the time you’re gone instead of thanking you for being a provider or she says she should have left you a long time ago because you’ll never amount to  nothing.  When you mention going back to school, she laughs because her momma told her that you won’t be nothing either.  Each time you want to hang out with friends you have to tell her you’re every move because she says I love you but I don’t trust you.  Now, you were also raised on God’s word and you know the man should be the head of the house but you are doing all you can.  You read God’s word that says “Don’t use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them (Ephesians 4:29),” but you keep accepting the hatred coming from the mouth of the person who claims to love you?  You begin to pray and God shows you that love is building up, not tearing down and love is kind, not mean so you leave.  After you’ve packed your bags and moved back home, you send her a text that simply reads, LOVE SHOULDN’T HURT THIS MUCH!

Love shouldn’t hurt as much as it does.  Love is not cuts, scars and bruises because love does not have hands.  But so many of the young ladies and young men, of this day and time, are dealing with grown folk issues before they are even grown and are not being taught the real meaning of the 4 letter word.  We don’t teach them that John 3:16 says “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life.” We don’t instill in them that Romans 5:8 say “but God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”  We don’t tell them that 1 John 4:9-11 say “In this the love of God was made manifest among us, that God sent his only Son into the world, so that we might live through him. In this is love, not that we have loved God but that he loved us and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins. Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another “or John 13:34 that say “A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another.” 

We are so busy being focused on our own lives that we as women are not teaching the girls and men aren’t taking the time to teach the boys how to respect themselves.  Instead of telling our children that no one should put their hands on them in a relationship, we wait until it’s too late.  Instead of telling our daughters that love shouldn’t leave scars, we buy Neosporin to cover them up.  Instead of getting them out of a violent situation we wait until there is a detective standing at your door saying your daughter/son was killed by the hands of the person they said they loved.  Yea, you saw signs but you didn’t want to get involved because when you did they went running back.  But it was at that point, you should have been running to God for Psalm 11:5 say “The LORD examines the righteous, but the wicked and those who love violence his soul hates.” 

Instead, you walk around your own house on egg shells because you don’t want to upset the kids.  You pay a cellphone bill but can’t go through the phone.  You pay the internet bill but can’t use their computer, you pay the mortgage or rent but you’re not allowed in their room.  Chile, please stop it! Grow up and parent!  Who cares if they get mad, what can they do?  You should be in your child’s business then maybe you’ll see the text that she gets calling her every name but her own or the Facebook statuses she puts arguing with other girls over a boy.  If you get more involved now, you may be able to stop the abuse before it starts.  Yes, emotional abuse is still abuse.  You allow your daughter to wear skirts so short you can see her butt when she bends over and then have the nerve to wonder why her name is floating around school like a bird in search of food.  You allow your son to wear sagging pants (because you bought those 2 sizes too big) so that he thinks he is “hard,” and then have the gall to say I don’t know why he is acting like that.  You allow your son to talk to you any kind of way and then wonder why he treats a girl so bad.  You allow your daughter to see you being belittled and torn down by words from a man and then she grows up to accept the same treatment. 

Love should be required in any relationship but in order to get it you have to love yourself first. Just because no one says you’re pretty doesn’t mean you’re not. Just because no one says you look nice it doesn’t mean you don’t.  Just because no one says you’re talented doesn’t mean you’re not. Stop waiting on FOLK to assess your value and STOP allowing folk to devalue you. Don’t you look in the mirror for yourself? Don’t you trust in the gifts God has given? If no one ever says or shows they love you, God does! Isn’t that enough? Value yourself and then others will value you.  Love shouldn’t hurt as much as it does, so stop allowing it too.

Daily Devotional – 11/15/11 “Who’s talking about me?”

How is it that we can allow folk to stop us from getting what God has for us?  I hear people saying all the time about how folk act at church and this is the reason they don’t go anymore.  But if you stop worrying about how folk look at you, what they whisper about you and how they run their mouth, you wouldn’t have a problem.  So what if they look like they are talking about you when you walk into church that means you are worth talking about.  So what if they looking at you funny when you walk in that means you’re worth looking at.  Just because folk got your name slipping from their lips it shouldn’t stop you from going into fellowship with God.  It should make your relationship stronger because you are supposed to pray for those types of folk.  Don’t believe me, read Matthew 5:44 which says “But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you.”  Don’t you know that when you pray for your enemies, it increases your blessings?  Well, that’s what God has promised.  Luke 6:35 says “Love your enemies! Do good to them. Lend to them without expecting to be repaid. Then your reward from heaven will be very great, and you will truly be acting as children of the Most High, for he is kind to those who are unthankful and wicked.”      

If you are more concerned with how folk look at you rather than the ministry of God, then you are going to church for the wrong reason anyway.  You say, “Church folk are so messy and they wonder why I haven’t been to church in a while,” but no matter what church you attend, there will be messy folk.  So stop running from them because I can guarantee God won’t accept that excuse when you’re standing in front of him on judgment day.  “Lord, I haven’t been to church because people always talking about me.”  So what?  Does the talking that folk do affect your day-to-day living, the amount of money you make, the clothes & shoes you wear, how you sleep and how you eat?  Then why does it affect your relationship with God?  It didn’t affect Jesus’ choice to be dragged from judgment halls, getting beaten all nights, pricked in the head with thorns, pierced in his side and nails dug into his hands & feet for our sins.  Instead he prayed to his Father on their behalf.  Even in the midst of his pain and agony, he prayed for his Father to forgive them.  In Luke 23:34 he says “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.”  But instead of us praying for the forgiveness of those who “hate on us”, we run from our church and from God. 

It’s like you needing a specific medicine that’ll save your life but every time you go to the store you feel like the people there are talking about you.  Do you risk your life by not getting the medicine you need or do you walk into the store each and every month with your head held high in order to live?  It’s the same way with God’s house each and every Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, and Saturday.  When you allow folk to keep you out of worship with God, it hurts you.  Oh, don’t get me wrong, it is also hurting them because whenever you sit in God’s house with your mind filled with hate, dislike and hurtful feelings for your brothers and sisters whom you are supposed to love; your prayers are hindered too.  For John 4:24 says “God is spirit, and his worshipers must worship in spirit and in truth.”

You should know that if you are the topic of people’s conversation, then that makes you worth talking about.  Grandma always told me that the more folk talk about you, the more you should bend your knees to pray.  But, Bonnie Raitt sang “Let’s give them something to talk about!”  Usually when folk talk about you they are jealous of the blessings and the favor you receive.  You know that it’s a sin to boast and brag about yourself, so chile, let them brag about you!  Continue to do the work that God has given you to do because eventually they will either want to worship the way you do in order to get like you or they’ll move on to talking about the next person.  But if you feed into the insecurities of those gossiping Christians, it makes them talk more. It’s just like adding fuel to an already burning fire but if you leave a fire alone, it usually burns out.  And just in case you didn’t know this let me be the first to tell you, if they are talking about you when you’re at church, they are talking about you when you’re not.  So there is no reason for you to miss the teaching of God’s word and the praise that is being given to him by staying home.  Because if they spent as much time minding their own business as they do yours, their praise would be more genuine anyway.

So, stop allowing folk to affect your relationship and walk with God because when it comes down to it, they can’t get you to Heaven because their ticket hasn’t been stamped anyway.  Being focused on them takes your focus from God and it’ll make you to sink every time.  That’s what happened to Peter when he wanted to walk on water.  He began to walk towards Jesus but as soon as he looked out to see the high winds blowing, he begin to sink because it was then that he started to doubt (Matthew 14:28-31).  But don’t you know that God will take care of your enemies?  Psalm 110:1 says “Sit at my right hand until I make your enemies a footstool for your feet.”   So instead of worrying about what folk are saying, get up, put on your Sunday best and walk into the church with your head held high ready to get your praise on and if the folk are there gossiping as usual, say to them “Away from me, Satan! For it is written: ‘Worship the Lord your God, and serve him only (Matthew 4:10)! 

Daily Devotional – 11/14/11 “Where is your battle gear?”

When a man or woman prepares for war they have to be just that, prepared.  They have to have on the appropriate clothes, the right body gear and have usable weapons.  They know, or they should know, that it would be crazy, irresponsible, and a death sentence to walk into a fight unprepared.  What good would it do for them to have a gun with no bullets, a shield that is cracked or not strong enough to withstand or a bulletproof vest that won’t stop bullets?  What sense would it make to jump into battle without being strong enough to endure it?

Well this is what happens every day when we, Christians, go out into battle without our gear and being unprepared.  Yea, I know you got a bible in your car, but if you never blow the dust off of it and open it, it’s ultimately worthless.  Luke 12:35 says “Be dressed ready for service and keep your lamps burning.”  God has equipped us with all that we need to handle the battles of this world, but we choose not to prepare ourselves for when the battle is at hand.  It is like you getting up in the morning and looking out the window to see the clouds forming.  You then turn on the news which states there is a 90% chance of rain but you still leave the house without a raincoat, rain boots, umbrella or jacket because you are looking at the 10% chance that it won’t.  But then the rain starts and you have nothing to shield you from the drops that are soaking your hair, clothes and shoes and now your jeans are so heavy from the rain that you can barely move your legs.  But had you prepared yourself before leaving home, you would have been covered and no matter how much rain falls, it’ll roll off of you like water does oil.

Ephesians 6:11 says “Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes.”  This says the full armor of God, not partial or some but the full.  But we’ve become so fast paced that we don’t have time to properly prepare ourselves.  But let me give you the necessary pieces to make sure you are prepared for war, the war of this world, the devil and his imps and the attacks that he sends.  For the bible tells us that our fight will not be against man itself because in Ephesians 6:12 it says “For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.”

Here are the 5 things I’ve found that will help you defeat the enemy.

  1. A belt of truth around your waist (Ephesians 6:14).  What good is it to lie when the truth shall set you free?  I’ve found that it’s easier to remember the truth because it never changes rather than a lie that you’ll soon forget.  Grandma always says that the little lies will send you hell quick.  I don’t know about you but I refuse to live in Hell to die and then be sentenced to eternity there. Proverbs 11:3 says “Honesty guides good people; dishonesty destroys treacherous people.”
  2. A breastplate of righteousness.   A breastplate is usually made of metal that is place to protect the chest area of your body and righteousness is defined as acting in accord with divine or moral law being free from guilt or sin.  This breastplate protects your heart and other vital organs from things that are thrown at you that are meant to kill or do bodily harm.  You know how folk lie on you, walk away or all over you, or wish bad things on your life.  But you have to first remove that badge of guilt and that patch of sin that is keeping you exposed to the evil darts that are being thrown your way.   Then you’ll be able to cover your chest with God’s word that tells us to love our brothers, to pray for our enemies and to forgive those who have hurt us in the past.  Whatever guilt you have over whatever situation, turn it over to God and let him work it out.
  3. A helmet of salvation.  Salvation is being delivered from sin and the power and effects it has.  1 John 1:9 says “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.”  Isn’t that all you need to know? That you can wear a helmet of salvation if you ask for it because God says, yes you’ve sinned but I’ll forgive you of those sins if you just ask me.  Yes, you’ve fallen a few times but I’ll raise you back up if you ask.  Yes, you’ve back slid into the world, but I’ll pull you back out if you reach out your hand.  Yes, you’ve ask for it many times before but I’ll keep forgiving you if you keep asking.  (enough said)             
  4. A sword of the spirit.  Now, this isn’t your normal sword but this is God’s word.  You know that book that is usually in the back window of your car that has been there so long the sun has changed the color of the pages or the one that is in your trunk that you keep throwing stuff on top of or the one that is home on your bookshelf that you walk past every day.  Yea, that one.  A sword is a weapon that is used for cutting and inflicting pain, when used in a fighting manner.  Well, if this is the case, why don’t we use God’s sword more rather than our mouth?  I’ve come to realize that God can hurt folk worse than I can.  It is written in Romans 12:19 “Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” says the Lord.” Still don’t believe me, read Deuteronomy 32:35 which God says “It is mine to avenge; I will repay. In due time their foot will slip; their day of disaster is near and their doom rushes upon them.” So why are you still trying to fight a losing battle?  I know that they’ve hurt you and you want to get them back and folk have walked away and now you’re bitter and wishing bad on their life; but it’s only hurting you.  Take God at his word when he says that he’ll handle this fight that you’re in.  Didn’t he give David strength to defeat Goliath and Samson strength to destroy those that held him captive? Why, because they asked.  Then why are you constantly standing on the front line of a fight that keeps knocking you down?  Eventually, if you keep trying to fight by yourself, you will get worn out and then your enemy will knock you out.   
  5.  Prayer.  Ephesians 6:18 says “And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the saints.” Prayer works every time. When you tired of being lied on, when you can’t see your way, when you are hurt, sick and even when you are weak, pray!   Romans 8:26 says “In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express.”  Haven’t you heard the expression, if I couldn’t say a word I’ll just wave my hand? If we are sincere in our asking and in our prayers, God hears even when we can’t say a word.  Because he is there, seeing the trouble that we are facing and he’ll be there to help us through it if we let him in.

We will face battles every day of our life because it has been promised but God won’t leave us to battle it alone.  He has given us a step by step guide to handle these battles but we have to be willing to open it and read it.  If you buy a piece of furniture that needs to be assembled, the only way to properly put it together right is by reading the instructions.  Living your life and winning the battles of the world are the same.  You have the instructions right in front of you, but you have to open them.  If you don’t know where to find them, go to your local Wal-Mart, Christian book store or online and ask for the Bible.  It comes in many different versions and languages to help you understand in order to properly prepare you for battle.  This war you are in may be getting the best of you now, but it isn’t over yet and you still have a chance of winning it.   Bible – Basic Instructions on Beating Life’s Enemies

Daily Devotional – 11/13/11 “We don’t get in the service like we use too!”

I’ve come to realize that we don’t get in the service like we use too. You know when someone would shout “I love the Lord he heard my cry” and the church would be on fire or when the deacons could have devotion so soul-stirring that it set the tone for the whole service. Even when the choir would sing “I want to go down to the river in the old-time way” and it would get deep down in your spirit and make you want to run when nobody is chasing you or when altar call would last 30 minutes because the holy spirit was ushered in. You know that type of service that delivered you from whatever had you burden down, when you came in sick but left well, came in with your heart heavy but left renewed, came in broken down and barely moving but left dancing and when you came in with pity and left with praise.

Where are those mothers that would sing a Dr. Watts or those deacons that didn’t mind getting on their knees, at the altar, to pray or the choir members who didn’t care who was watching them when they shouted in the choir stand? Why can’t we praise like we use too? Why can’t we pray like we use too?  Why can’t we teach like we use too?  We are so busy being focused on the number of souls coming that we are forgetting about the number of souls being saved.  Now we are wearing shoes that are too little, just because they are cute that we can no longer stand for God. We got on dresses so short that when you cross your legs, everything that shouldn’t be showing is and now we can’t shout for God. We got a little money in our pockets and act like there is no reason to lift up our arms to give God praise and since everything seems to be going right, we don’t have to lift up our voice to offer thanks! But isn’t God worthy of praise no matter what the day, time, situation or circumstance?  We call him at any time and expect him to show up but we pick and choose when it is convenient for us. 

I don’t know about you but I want to have chuch (not church) like we use to have when you left with your hair sweated out from dancing and your clothes twisted from allowing the holy ghost to have its way! You know when it didn’t matter if you broke the heel on your shoes from dancing because God has been good to you so now you want to show it. When you didn’t go to service to show off your new clothes but the grace that God keeps giving you every day or when you didn’t go to service to show off your new haircut, but to give thanks for the blessings that God has already given you.  But we don’t get in the service or the spirit like we use too. We don’t sing from our hearts anymore, we don’t pray for deliverance anymore because we just want to be heard.  We don’t teach like we use too because we are too busy worried about folk.  We don’t have the same Holy Ghost power that we use too.  It used to be,  when you saw your sister crying at the altar because she was dealing with things, you’d go to her, hug her while telling her that God can fix whatever ails her but now we stand back wondering what she is going through so that we can gossip.  It used to be, when someone was going through, sick or had a death in the family, church members would cook and clean or even stop by with some kind words but now we are too busy with our own lives to even look in on somebody else.  We don’t treat our brothers and sisters like the bible tells us too.  We are so wrapped up in what folk think or what others are saying that we don’t get in the spirit anymore.  

We’ve allowed technology to trap us into texting during worship service, spread gossip during the sermon and give us an excuse to not carry a bible. But if the bible is supposed to be our weapon against the battles that have been set by man, what good is not having it?  Yea, you may have the bible app downloaded on your phone but I guarantee you won’t throw it if someone was attacking you. Yea, you may have the bible app downloaded but how many times have you actually opened it?  We’ve got to get back to real worship and meaningful service. We’ve got to get back to serving God and the church in a way that is pleasing unto God’s sight.  We got to get back to true worship. 

When folk were having true worship experiences we didn’t have all of the trouble like we have now.  We didn’t face the sickness, the back sliding, the backbiting, and the back stabbing that we face now.  When you had true worship you could go to the church with your trouble without worrying about somebody spreading it around, you could go to the Pastor and not worry about being judged or the deacons without worrying about being turned down for the assistance that you needed.  I want that type of worship experience.  I want to be able to feel the Holy Ghost in my worship without having to be pumped and primed by the musicians or the minister.  I want to have a true, meaningful worship experience.  We don’t get in the service like we use too, but I’m praying that we start before it is too late.

Daily Devotional – 11/12/11 “A Saturday prayer”

Our Father which art in Heaven, hallowed will be thy name, thy kingdom come, thy will be done in earth as it is in Heaven.  Lord, as I petition your throne I must first thank you.  Even when I was too tired to say my prayers on last night, you covered me.  When I was too tired to give you thanks for keeping me all day, you did it anyway.  When I was too stubborn to lift up your name you still lifted me and for that I’ve got to thank you.  Even when I may forget you, you never forget me so Lord please forgive me.  Forgive me of my sins.  Forgive me for any wrong that I’ve done knowingly or unknowingly.  Lord, I’ve got to thank you because when I opened my eyes this morning I could still see.  When I lifted my arms this morning they still worked.  When I stood on my legs this morning they didn’t give away from under me.  When I used my feet this morning they moved.  Lord I’ve got to thank you.  It wasn’t because I’ve been so good, kept your commandments like I’m supposed to or even lived my life all the time the right way but because you’re a man who keeps his promises.  Lord I’ve got to thank you.  I know this isn’t Sunday morning and I’m not standing before folk praying but lord I’m thankful this morning. When I felt my husband move I’ve got a reason to be thankful.  When I heard my children voices without seeing their faces I’ve got a reason to be thankful. When I opened the refrigerator, saw food in it and then had strength to cook and an appetite to eat, I’ve got a reason to be thankful.  Lord, even when I don’t desire your mercy, you send it.  When I don’t deserve a blessing, you send it.  Thank you Father, for you are always right there.  Now, Lord I ask you to bless, cover and protect the person reading this.  Fix whatever situation they are toiling with, release the stronghold that has them bound and wipe the tears that maybe streaming down their face.  Lord, I don’t know what they need but I know that you are a supplier of whatever it is.  Lord, do it now.  Someone is tired because they didn’t sleep well, send them rest now.  Someone is up early trying to figure out how to get their head above the water that seems to be drowning them, Lord send their life jacket now.  Someone is up because a love one is gone and even though it has been months, they are still dealing with the grief, Lord send peace.  Someone is getting ready to bury a love one on today, Lord send them strength for your word says that all must die in order to live again.  Lord, go into the hospitals and prisons and touch the bodies of all those there.  Protect those that are living on the streets, fighting in war, the soldiers that have come home but still fighting a war within themselves, the children with peer pressure and bullying, the mother, the father, the sister, the brother and even those that wish harm on others.  Forgive those, father, who cast you away from their presence because they know not what they do.  Bind satan and whatever attacks he plots today.  Lord, I may not be all that I should be but I am your child and I’m ready for whatever path you have for me.  Lord, I’ll walk this path as long as you continue to light it.  Lord, bless today because I know you will and you can.  Do it in your time!  This prayer I humbly submit to you on this morning.  Amen