It’s simple, stop being used. You have a man at home who finds pleasure in using you as a punching bag and you allow it because he apologizes or buys you a gift. You have a girl at home who only enjoys your company when you’re spending money and not quality time. You have a job that finds pleasure in dumping all of the work on you while they enjoy their nights and weekends at home. You have friends who only come around when they need something from you or church members who call you only when they need you to do something. STOP BEING USED! Luke 6:38 says, “Give, and it will be given to you. Good measure, pressed down, shaken together, running over, will be put into your lap. For with the measure you use it will be measured back to you.” Now, this doesn’t mean give until you’re in the poor house, but it says give so that the way you give it’ll be given back to you. But there is a difference in giving and being used. If you come to me and you need $20 for gas until your payday, that’s me being a blessing unto you and that blessing will be given back to me but if you come to me every Friday because you know it’s my payday with no intention of every paying it back because you don’t work, then you’re using me and at some point I’ve got to stop it or it’ll only continue. It’s just like a parent and their child, if you continue to baby a grown man he’ll never be a man because he always has his mother to fall back on and then you wonder why he or she keeps making mistakes but never learn from them. At some point, you’ve got to stop being used. If your son or daughter, husband or wife, sister or brother is a drug addict, will you buy them the drugs that are killing them? I would think no, but if you are being an enabler to them because you keep allowing them to use you for extra cash every week, then you are.
You have to make up in your mind that you will no longer be the doormat for folks to walk all over. You have a teenager in your home that makes more rules than you do and you’re paying the bills. I had a conversation with my niece on last night and she said to me that most days she wakes up with an attitude and I had to stop and ask her, what reason did she have to have an attitude when everything she has is not been bought by her. I told her when she starts paying bills, cooking dinner, sacrificing sleep for working and then dealing with co-workers, friends and family members all while trying to maintain a household, then she is entitled to an attitude but until then she can zip her lips. See, we’ve allowed children to parent us when we should be parenting them. We buy them all the expensive electronics, shoes, clothes and jewelry and then act shocked when they stand in our face talking smart. We’ve allowed them to exploit themselves all over Facebook and then wonder why no one will respect them or hire them for a job. We allow them to slam doors in our house when we say things they don’t like and even allow them to bring home bad grades when all they have to do is go to school. Baby, we’ve got to stop being used. Yea, you missed out on a lot during your childhood so you want to make sure they have everything. You and your spouse divorced so now the kids used that as an excuse to act a fool and you fall right into the trap. STOP IT! Stop apologizing because you have to work long hours. Stop feeling bad because you won’t allow them to spend the night over everybody’s house or run the streets like their friends do. Your only job is to love your children and you do that by taking care of them and providing the basic necessities of life. Now, don’t get me wrong there isn’t anything wrong with rewarding good behavior but why would you go out and buy your son a $60.00 Xbox game after they’ve put their teachers through hell the entire week in school? Stop being used!
The word says that people should treat you how they want to be treated. If you don’t believe me, read Matthew 7:12, Luke 6:31 and James 2:8 because they all say “Do to others whatever you would like them to do to you.” You are worthy of being more than a part time lover for someone you’ve given all your love too. You are worthy than being more than a motel room chick for someone who you pay hotel prices for. Stop settling for a few hours per week when you’re giving them full time attention. Stop settling for minimum wage when your resume shows your net worth to be 6 figures. The simplest way to tell someone’s true feelings, go through something. Get sick and see how many volunteer to take you to the doctor. Have a death in your family and see who’ll be there to comfort you when you’re looking for peace and understanding. Lose your job and see who’ll invite you out for dinner, on them. Need a shoulder to cry on and see who will offer theirs. Ask for a few bucks to hold you over and see who will be quick to give them to you. Tell somebody a secret and see if it gets out. Everyone that is in your life is not meant to be forever because most of them have their seasons, just like flowers that only bloom during a certain time of the year so stop trying to keep them around when their season is up. If they’ve left you, let them go. Don’t keep chasing them because if they wanted to be caught, they’ll stop running.
Prayer for today: Heavenly Father, I thank you today for all that you’ve done. I know that you have made me in your image, so I am asking you now to forgive me for not valuing my self-worth. God I know that you’ve equipped me with the things that I need to endure the hardships of this world and today I choose ME! God bless my home, keep my mind, & search my heart & if there is anything there that should not be please take it away. I am worthy God because you made me. I am worthy God because I am yours and today I make a vow to stop being used or a user if that’s what I am. I will put my trust in you. God, guide my footsteps so that I may walk in your way. Guide my tongue so that I may talk like you. Guide my heart so that I may love like you. Open my eyes so that I may see you in me. God continue to be my provider and continue to keep lighting my path. Don’t take your hand off of me even though I may stumble because I need you. I love you God and I humbly submit this prayer to you. Amen
Lakisha, the Author 