Misery is defined as a serious lack of contentment or happiness or something that causes great unhappiness. If something or someone is causing you to be unhappy, YOU can change it. If you are grown, no one is responsible for the state of your life but you. 2 Corinthians 4:8-9 says “We are pressed on every side by troubles, but we are not crushed. We are perplexed, but not driven to despair. We are hunted down, but never abandoned by God. We get knocked down, but we are not destroyed.” See, even though your life may not be where you think it should be it isn’t over. Just because you don’t have the job you want, you have one. Just because your husband doesn’t have the means to take care of you like a basketball wife, he is still yours and he is there, so stop keeping company with misery and enjoy your life and if your life isn’t pleasing to you then change it. If you are depressed, get help but stop making the others around you depressed by always bringing the rain to the parade. Just because you didn’t get anything sent to the office on Valentine’s Day don’t go around bursting other folk’s balloons. Just because you don’t have a good relationship with your sister doesn’t mean you try to ruin the one your cousin has with hers by spreading lies. You might be all alone in your misery state but it doesn’t mean others want to join you. Yea, misery may love company but your company doesn’t love her. Stop gossiping when others are hurting because you think they are getting what they deserve, because what goes around surely comes back around. Stop bringing all of your issues to the party because you want others to be as miserable as you. If all you do is complain about this and that, stay home. If the only chance I get to hang out and let my hair down is at girls night out once per month, the last thing I want is for you, with your miserable behind, ruining it. I know that you lost your job but baby that’s been 6 months ago, get up and find you another one. I am not going to sit at my job on the phone with you going over the same thing every day so that I can lose my job too. I know that you may be miserable in your life today but why are you taking it out on me? I know that you may be upset about the state of your marriage but just because mine is going well you’d try to sabotage it just so we can be miserable together? You say you want the best for your friends yet you throw rocks and hide your hands. You listen to one friend vent about something another friend did and instead of you keeping the information to yourself, you quickly run and tell; misery is that you? You can’t be mad at the man you married because he is not holding up his part of the vows when you knew he was a cheater before you stood before God and the preacher to take his hand in marriage. You can’t be mad at the woman you had a baby with because you knew she wasn’t lifetime material when you laid down with her. Yea, see when you lay down with a person (man or woman) and you choose to have sex, you need to make sure they are worth spending a lifetime with because if you have a baby it’ll be a lifetime you’ll both share.
You used to date a guy who never treated you right because he always cheated and never kept his promises. You are thankful that the 2 of you never had any children together so you decide to go your separate ways. It’s been 5 years and you see him at the movies and he introduces you to his new wife. He tells you that he turned his life over to Christ 3 years ago and he is a changed man. After this chance meeting, you go home steaming mad. You look him up on Facebook and see the pictures of him and his new family and it just seems to add fuel to the fire that is already burning in your head, so you decide to friend his wife. Now, you’re sending her messages talking about all the times he cheated on you, how he gave you a STD while you all were dating and how he was never dependable and trustworthy. You tell her that you don’t know why she married him because he isn’t worth her time or trouble. His wife, the woman that he married and bore his children doesn’t have time for this mess nor your games and she lets you know it quickly and to the point by simply saying, “Sweetie, get over it because although misery loves company I’m not the company you want!” See, when he was with you he may have been all those things but now he is not. When he was with you he may have not been marriage material but maybe you weren’t his rib that God had taken. Get over it! If you took as much time getting yourself together as you do trying to ruin other folk lives, your living would be better. Stop acting crazy, deranged and erratic making folks ask, “Misery is that you?” Matthew 5:22 says, “But I say, if you are even angry with someone, you are subject to judgment! If you call someone an idiot, you are in danger of being brought before the court. And if you curse someone, you are in danger of the fires of hell.”
Stop wallowing in your misery pool of pity, however, if you choose too don’t think I’ll be quick to jump in. Don’t get me wrong, I’ll reach out my hand to pull you out but I won’t allow you to pull me in. Yea, I’ll listen to you when you call but I won’t spend all my free time tied up in it when I should be spending it with my family, that’s keeping misery company. Yea, I’ll go walking with you when you need to vent but not every day because that’s keeping misery company, I also have a life. I may even have a drink with you to listen to you complain about your man or woman problems, but not every night, that’s keeping misery company, because I’ll either become an alcoholic or lose the family I have at home. I know that it’s hard being alone but if you try to be less gloomy you may get company every now and then. If you tried being pleasant every once in a while you may get invited to dinner. If you stopped being sad all the time you may just realize that you have great friends to enjoy your life with. James 5:11 says, “We give great honor to those who endure under suffering. For instance, you know about Job, a man of great endurance. You can see how the Lord was kind to him at the end, for the Lord is full of tenderness and mercy.” God says although you are going through suffering now, it’s not meant to last because after your suffering comes God’s mercy and his mercy endures forever. Even during your depression, your trials, your tribulations, your test and your storms; hold on! Don’t try to make others feel like you do because it isn’t fair. Don’t think that God has left you during these hard times because he hasn’t. Your life will have bad days but don’t allow them to outweigh the good ones. James 1:12 says, “God blesses those who patiently endure testing and temptation. Afterward they will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him.” After you’ve endured all the bad it makes you stronger and in your strength you gain patience and being patient allows you to present yourself as a living sacrifice to God which is pleasing in his sight. Romans 5:3-4 says, “We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they help us develop endurance. And endurance develops strength of character, and character strengthens our confident hope of salvation.” Misery is miserable and if you allow her in she’ll take over. You are entitled to a bad day just don’t allow it to turn into a week because weeks leads to months and months to years and years into a lifetime.
Lakisha, the Author 